2 - Outtakes Hello, and welcome to another edition of This Fucked Up World, with your host, A Stupid Fuck. I'm afraid there's only bad news today, because...oh, look at that, the world hasn't blow up yet! Isn't that...just fucking too bad? Well, there's one thing that makes the world at least tolerable...well, maybe tolerable like Bozo The fucking Clown nailed to a white wall is tolerable. And that's when people fuck up! It just gets me off to watch people, especially when they're trying to be serious, just blow whatever they're doing out their ass in front of everyone. If you watch someone for long enough, eventually you WILL get to see them fuck up, and that just makes my little cup flow with over, you know. I bet even the Jesus Christ! Wouldn't YOU like to see a Jesus Christ blooper? Like...like, he's trying to cure some blind old fart and then fucks up and blows his kidney out the back of his tunic, you know? "Whoops, oh silly me, hohohohoho!" I, I'd just...I would sell one of Jerry's kids into slavery to see something like that! Well, if it's good enough for them, then it's good enough for me, so, here's my gift to you! The last year's worth of my own personal rant fuck-ups! Enjoy them, or... fucking die or something. *beep* Rant...take...2...million...ah-haa. *beep* You forgot the...you forgot the part about how after the...Damn. *beep* You forgot the part about how after the Illuminati take over, 2 the Ranting Gryphon is going to use secret m...military...pbhhhaa. *beep* And since you're too fucking...oh fuck. And since you're too fucking stupid to realize how...dapbht bbhha. *beep* Some of us even think they make...pbrrth! Damn! *beep* A good case of 24-hour...pbbrrht, that's hard to say! "24-hour projectile leprosy"...damn! *beep* A good case of 24-hour projectile leprosy will brighten the rest of your rea...pbrrht! Why is it so hard to say...I suck so hard! *beep* A good case of 24-hour projectile leprosy will brighten the rest of your re..whaa! Aaargh! That's the toughest shit to say in the world. "Brighten the rest of your week". "The rest of your week". " The rest of your week", "will brighten the rest of your week"... *beep* We'd rather spend our time and moneys...pbrrht. Fuuuck...meee! *beep* You walk through the graveyard, and all the tombstones have...ah, oh shit. *beep* You know, there'll just be something you just, y-y-y-you need it in your life like you need another...like you need another...? Goddamn that s-shit! Ah! Nnngh... need another man... I need another joint... *beep* And he says, "You know, I heard that you beat up your last boyfriend and stabbed'em with a f... oh shit. *beep* There are plenty of people on the outside who've already...ug...djah! *beep* You know, you're gonna get off work at the chemical factory, tossed your non-bio... shit. *beep* Just because you have the power to do something... *phone rings*... god- fucking-damnit. *beep* Lemme...*phone rings*...AAARGH, FUCK THE PHONE, fuck, ah goddamnit! You...piece of shit. *beep* The part that sucks shit is that in the very same group of people is probably the l...damnit that sucks. Whythe...ahwahwah...*beep* The part that sucks shit is that it...dyaah...waahahah, I suck! *beep* I might even share with them, but most of them don't even... shiiittttiiiiiI fucked up. *beep* I might even share with them, but most of them don't even have any...fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuuucckk... yeah. *beep* Satan just ripped the biggest broccoli-cheese casserole fart in the known un... oh shit, goddamnit! *beep* Gryphon spooge execution for you! *burp* Mhehehe. *beep* Then the only one who'll talk to you is Bruno, the hairy or*burp*... oh, you know, that just didn't work, did it? *beep* Sick of people designating one day a year to eat a good meal just because a bunch of religious fucknuts beats the raf..pbhh bha obph. *beep* Sick of people designating ...oh damn, fuck me hard! *beep* He's going on about generous...shit. Shit, shit, shit, that's not gonna work and I'll have to go all the way back now. Damnit. Aagh! *beep* It already sucks hard enough to vacuum Helen Hunt's moustache...pbht. "Helen Hunt'sh mouschtache, hehey!" *beep* This is 2, your baby-killing Ranting Grifin...griffing? *beep* You can't accidentally get fucked, and judging bys the...shit. *beep* You can't accidentally get fucked, and judging by the looks of most of these women, they're probably...goddamn my ass. Ah. Oh boy, maybe I'll just have to give up.